Friday, August 4, 2017

Top Ten Worst Books of the Year!

I honestly can't believe that it's been a year since I started writing this thing! Along the way, I've done more reading than I think I've done in years and have found some amazing books from the most unexpected places. I've even gotten to speak to some wonderful people and have never been more grateful for the world of literature. So, in celebration of my one year anniversary, I've comprised too lists of my top ten favorite and least favorite books I've reviewed over the past year. So, without further ado: The Best of the Shelf and the Worst of the Waste Bin!

Let's just get the negatives out first so we can appreciate the good a bit more, 'kay? So, I present to you:

The Worst of the Waste Bin (Top 10 Worst)

10 Artemis

Honestly, this is the only book I felt bad about putting in the Waste Bin of Despair. I just knew that if I was going to take on this challenge of being a critic, I had to really look at the book and acknowledge its flaws. And this book does have flaws. A lot of them. Too many uninteresting backstories, not enough scares, a comic book plot line that doesn't deliver what it promises, etc. That being said, there was heart in this book. I could tell that this is something the author really wanted to write but just didn't pull off. So, yeah, it made the list.

9 Confessions of a Murder Suspect

A lot of my putting this book here is the result of disappointment and forgetfulness. For a book largely credited to one of the most famous and bestselling authors in the country to be so forgettable just feels wrong. When I guess the ending within the first five pages of a mystery, we have a serious problem. A barrel full or red herrings and a bland protagonist didn't help the matter.

8 The Neverland Wars

For heaven's sake... it's Neverland! I. Should. Not. Be. Bored! A war that's barely a war, whimsy that barely deserves to call itself whimsy, and weird and uncomfortable situations have almost no appeal whatsoever. Top it off with an obnoxious protagonist and we have solid material for the Waste Bin.

7 Incursion: Catalyst Moon

Another book that I've completely forgotten before I started making up this list. Way too many people and not nearly enough reasons to care about them. Plot lines that go absolutely nowhere. A seriously lackluster ending and, ugh, those names! I'm still baffled as to how exactly this won the Inkitt publishing contest but I'm not a computer so what do I know. 

6 A Quest of Heroes

If I had to sum it up in one word, this book would be hilariawful. So many things to laugh at when you're really not supposed to. A plot and characters and world so cliche that I honestly wondered if it was to be taken seriously. This quest of stereotypes and every exhausted fantasy writing trend known to man just didn't cut it and so it landed itself here.

5 Splintered 

Hands down the worst Alice in Wonderland inspired book that I came across this year. Occasional bits of creativity and positive madness just can't make up for the fact that this book is a crap ton of style with absolutely no substance. Alyssa is bland as unbuttered toast, Jeb is the devil, way too much focus on the wardrobe, and I draw the frigging line at skateboarding down a sand dune. Just nope.

4 The Shadow Prince

Wanna read Twilight from Edward's perspective? You can but read this instead because it's faster and you'd get the same horrible writing, awful characters, and painful plot you'd find there. Also..."bringing all the boys to the yard." Enough said.

3 Tiger's Curse

Or Tigerlight, as I've decided to call it. A book about one girl's extremely pampered trip to India in which she's the center of the friggin' world and all the hot guys are after her. And she eats a lot. But she's not fat, seriously we promise! Also, Hindu goddess picks caucasian Oregonian as her chosen hero. Nope. Just...just nope.

2 The Gatekeeper's Sons

The world's most perfectly perfect girl enchants all the Greek Gods with her wonderfulness and they give her stuff. Ugh! Looking back at this thing just gets me riled up about how much I hated it. This snail-paced fluff piece in which the God of Death cries about a horse and Mary Sue gets everything and when she doesn't get what she wants...meh. Oh well. At least I have my annoying immortal dog.

1 Need

DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE....yeah, I'm still not over how bad this one was. Mean, selfish, unrealistic, uncaring main character, cliches out the whazoo, self indulgent plot bending to the whims of the horrible protagonist, I could go on and on. To this day I still get sick to my stomach thinking about this book. There's a reason I created a whole new level of awful just to put this thing in. Also...say that you hate Maine one more time! I dare you to say it!

Honorable Mentions
Cruel Beauty (everyone is awful but love wins the day...'kay.)
Stealing Snow (nasty protagonist takes away from an otherwise colorful winter world)
Schooled In Magic (tell us again how much better you are compared to Harry Potter why don't you)
Witch & Wizard (way too cartoony and random to be taken as seriously as it wants you to)
Awoken (to be fair this is also on my Honorable Mentions for Best Books of the Year)

It's been a rough go at times, but the valleys make the peaks worth it all the more! Thanks for a great year and I hope to see you at the top ten best!

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